So Gloomy:

    I am a member of the unemployed now with nothing but a typer and a couple of paint brushes to hold off the world. So keep your fingers crossed for me and hope the gods are on my side. There's my 5 year old daughter involved and if I lost her, that would do me in. But things sometimes have a way of working. There's no need to lay it down yet. There's a novel in my mind and The Days Run Away... moving very nicely. but but but....

     This letter is so gloomy, Jim, that I can't ever write it, finish it. I'll write when things are looking better.

    -Bukowski to Jim Roman

     January 11, 1970

That's pretty much how I feel everyday, i.e., the part about "can't ever write it" or "finish it."